Didn't We Love?
by BlondieLaFleur
Summary: This is how Sonny and Kate should have been written following the Claudia/Dante/Coleman storylines. Also, picture Megan Ward in the role of Kate  because no offense to Kelly Sullivan, but she'll never be Kate .
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One:**Glancing at the broken clock on her desk, Kate considered how closely the unreliable contraption mirrored her life. The hands on the clock were stuck, unsure of which way to go. They existed but couldn't move, couldn't find a purpose. Although she was officially on top in the fashion world again and enjoying herself with a very complimentary bartender, Kate felt as though she was at an impasse. If this was all there was to life, well, it was lonely. Perhaps the realization wouldn't have burned her heart so fiercely a few years ago, but after knowing what real love and contentment could feel like, the absence of it was that much harder to bear. But before she began feeling too sorry for herself, Kate forced a tired laugh. Laughing was the only way she could keep from crying and Kate Howard had no intention of sharing her tears with the world. The few times she had done it – been vulnerable, that is – it ended in heartache. No, those moments of weakness were once again a foreign concept to Crimson's editor and chief. After Sonny and her parted ways, Kate worked overtime to build her walls back up and they were stronger than ever. It would take an entire army to tear them down. "Kate, earth to Kate, didn't you hear me say that the sketches from Jacque, that new up and coming designer from Milan, are here? You've been waiting for them all week and, I confess, I peeked and they're amazing!" Maxie's enthusiastic, fashion-loving voice broke Kate out of her thoughts and reintroduced her to reality. A reality that no longer included Sonny Corinthos. "I'm sorry, Maxie. I was trying to reconstruct a layout in my head and…well, never mind," she lied. "Hand them over."Maxie did as she was told and waited anxiously for her mentor's insights. No matter how much Maxie believed she understood fashion, she was smart enough to realize that there was always something valuable to learn from Kate. And considering Maxie practically worshiped the ground she walked on and wanted to grow up to be Kate Version 2.0, her attention was more than focused on the woman in front of her. "Exquisite. These are exactly the kind of pieces Crimson needs to promote to young women everywhere. They're edgy but tasteful, perfect for dressing up or down. The kind of clothes I would have killed to have access to growing up. Get me Jaque on the phone now. I want to make him an offer he can't refuse." Fourty-five minutes later and Kate had successfully worked her magic. Well, almost. She had garnered a trial run and that was more than Coutoure or any of her other competitors could say. A few phone calls and favors had resulted in Kate earning the title of fashion overseer of Port Charles' annual Nurse's Ball. It was there that she would have her models draw attention to Jacque's new designs while walking the runway. A one of a kind piece would be auctioned off before the night was over and the press that Jacque and Crimson would get from the partnership would be monumental. At least, that was what Kate had promised Jacque and she intended to deliver. If her efforts paid off, Jacque's clothes would become the official Crimson line. Of course, there was a catch and Kate was just waiting for all hell to break loose because of it. Jacque had visited Kate in Port Charles back in the summer before jetting off to Milan for inspiration and the young designer had taken quite a shining to Kristina Corinthos during that time. Kate had offered to give Kristina a tour of Crimson's offices and supply her with free clothes samples to take with her to Yale as a favor to Alexis when Jacque showed up unannounced. Apparently, though Kate was unaware of it at the time, Kristina had shared with Jacque her pipe dream – to be a famous model. Jacque thought that Kristina would be the perfect fresh face for his designs and asked, or rather demanded, that Kate make her the star of the Nurse's Ball and his line or he would collaborate with Gisele instead. Kate, whose powers of persuasion were often likened to a hypnotist, had phoned Kristina instantly at Yale with the offer. It took very little convincing to get her on board. Honestly, what eighteen-year-old wouldn't trade in law books for the runway? It was an opportunity that only came once in a lifetime. Many young girls would have killed for it. Unfortunately, Kate herself might just be killed for offering it to Kristina. And just like that, almost as if she had a sixth sense of some sort, the front door of Crimson flew open with a loud bang and Kate could hear Maxie in a panic begging whoever the intruders were to calm down. Kate counted down in her head how long it would take for the door to her office to be broken off its hinges. Three…two…one…"What on earth do you think you are doing?" Alexis Davis' shrill voice demanded as Sonny crossed his arms in anger, standing beside her in support. This was clearly a tag-team effort. "Kristina phoned both of us saying she's quitting Yale," Sonny revealed in disapproval. "For your magazine," Alexis chimed in, rolling her eyes and looking as though she might have literally thrown something across the room at Kate had an item been within her reach. Kate quickly relocated the scissors on her desk to a drawer before making an attempt to defend her actions. "Kristina is an adult and I don't think she would appreciate the two of you…""We are her parents, Kate," Alexis cut in. "Her parents who know what's best for her and that is getting an education and not flouncing around in overpriced garments that barely cover her body for fifteen minutes of fame and attention from people like...""People like me, Alexis?" Kate shook her head in amusement, refusing to be spoken down to. "And I don't seem to recall you having contempt for fashion when I was handing out free samples to you and Diane last week.""Don't you dare patronize me, Kate. You went over our heads," Alexis declared."And now Kristina is going to ruin her life because of it," Sonny said in a matter of fact tone. "Well, I'm sorry you feel that way but I think that Kristina has a lot of potential and the two of you should consider that and respect what she says she wants." Throwing her hands up in frustration, Alexis mumbled something about having a court date and promised Kate that this discussion wasn't over before turning quickly on her heels and storming out. Sonny stood there silently, his eyes practically boring holes into Kate. The intensity of his gaze used to be something that drew her to him, but that was back when he looked at her with desire instead of disdain. "Do you have something else to add, because I have a conference call to make and I refuse to tell Kristina how she should live her life. I tried that with you and we know how that ended."Kate had tried to convince Sonny to change, to leave the mob for good and build a new life with her. Instead, he chose revenge and a marriage to Claudia Zacchara. Even then, Kate had tried to work past the hurt in an effort to warn Sonny of Claudia's involvement in Michael's shooting. But every time she made a move to tell Sonny the truth, he pulled away and chose to put his trust in everyone but her. Kate had decided since then that it wasn't her place to save anyone or tell them what paths to take in life. "I don't expect you to understand," Sonny replied coldly. "You're not a mother."Kate felt herself recoil at his words, but she held her chin high and refused to let the pain his insult inflicted show. It had been months since she had seen Sonny. Even after the truth about Claudia finally came out and she was killed by Michael, there was no sign of the mob boss. It wasn't as though she expected a reunion, far from it, but a simple acknowledgement of how she was right would have been appreciated. Instead, Sonny chose to see her again to tell her that she was going to be the person responsible for messing up his daughter's future, and to remind her of the fact that she had missed her opportunity to be a mother. It was a fact she had once shared with Sonny that she regretted and now he was using it against her. How they had gone from claiming to love one another a little less than a year ago to this was incomprehensible to her. "You're right, Sonny. I know absolutely nothing and you know everything," Kate responded. "No, you knew something I didn't," Sonny continued on, taking two steps closer to Kate until his face was close enough to hers for her to feel his breath on her skin. He gave her a challenging look and Kate raised an eyebrow, perplexed. "I have a feeling your coming here wasn't about Kristina," Kate concluded. "So what is it? What do you have to say, Sonny?"Shaking his head back in forth, a bitter laugh escaped Sonny's lips as he cleared his throat before saying to Kate what he had wanted to say since finding out the truth last week."You knew that Dante was my son and you kept it from me," Sonny said. "And what I'm wondering, is what else you lied to me about while we were together, Kate Howard."Kate bristled, working overtime not to let any emotion show at being found out. A part of her was relieved that the secret that had weighed her down for so many years was finally lifted, but to see Sonny looking at her the way he was now…like a stranger…it stung down to the core of her very being."Kate Howard? No Connie?" she asked in avoidance."Well, y'know, you always talked about Connie being gone and I didn't want to believe it but you were right. Because the girl I knew growing up, the Connie who told me she loved me and that I could trust her…I don't see her. In fact, when I look at you now Kate, I don't really see anyone I know or would want to know."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two:**

Kate wasn't certain how much time had passed since her ex-fiancé's last insult. All she knew was that for the first time in her life, her mouth seemed unable to move. The ability to conjure up a witty rebuttal out of thin air had suddenly left her and Sonny almost looked as though he was apologetic. "Kate?" he questioned, lifting his hand as though he might supply her with a comforting touch. Sonny changed his mind at the last second and crossed his arms tightly to avoid physical contact. He refused to be the better person. She shouldn't be made to feel better over her mistake. What she had done to him was inexcusable. "I won't stand here and fight with you over something I can't change," Kate finally announced with a matter of fact shrug of the shoulders. "I did what I promised Olivia I would do. I was loyal to my cousin and you of all people should understand loyalty."His business thrived on it, after all. When the two of them were together, Sonny had said on numerous occasions how much Jason's allegiance to him had meant. They shared a mutual respect for one another built on trust. Olivia had trusted her cousin with a secret and no matter how awful that secret was, Kate couldn't betray her. Someone like Carly or Claudia might have run to Sonny with the juicy details, but Kate had more class than that. "I do understand loyalty," Sonny yelled. Maxie chose that moment to stick her head into Kate's office and mouthed the words _Should I call security?_ Kate waved her assistant off as Sonny worked to compose himself. "Why do you think I'm so angry? When you agreed to marry me, when you let me put that engagement ring on your finger, that meant your loyalty was supposed to be to me." Sonny slammed his hand against his chest, repeating his last few words to make his point clear. "To me," he declared. Kate could see the pain in his eyes, but she wouldn't back down. Not when Sonny was being a hypocrite considering all that he had put her through over the past few years. "You want to talk about betrayal? Ok, fine, lets talk. How about we discuss your intimacies with Claudia Zacchara and Carly while you said you were committed to me? Or how you actually married Claudia and almost started a family with her right after I was shot on our wedding day? You tell me Sonny, you look at me and tell me how choosing those women over me, the mob over me, compares to my keeping my word to Olivia about Dante."Kate threw her hands up in exasperation as memories of the pain inflicted on her heart while she was with Sonny came rushing back full force. He had no right to act high and mighty in front of her. His arrogance was insulting, and that was putting it nicely. Sonny stared at the wounded woman in front of him briefly before averting his eyes in shame. Kate was right. He hated that she had kept the truth about Dante from him, but what choice did she have? Olivia was the person responsible for all of the lies. So why wasn't Sonny all the way across town yelling at her? Because he didn't expect more from her, that's why. Sonny knew the kind of person Olivia could be and had never thought too highly of her when they were dating as teenagers because of it. Kate, on the other hand, was supposed to be different. She was supposed to be better than Olivia, better than him. Sonny was guilty of putting her up on a pedestal that no person could realistically achieve and now he was punishing her for falling from grace. "You're right," he relented. "I barge back into your life for the first time in months and start putting you down. You don't deserve that."Kate hesitated, unsure of where Sonny was going with this. If he thought she was letting her guard down with him because he had suddenly gone from Kujo to sad puppy dog eyes and dimples, he was sadly mistaken. "Yes, well, you can see yourself out the same way you came in," Kate replied in the dismissive tone she often used when speaking to Maxie or Lulu after a particularly irritating work day. Sonny didn't seem to hear her, or he was choosing to ignore her. Either way, Kate didn't have time for his mind games. She was far too busy to waste her energy on appeasing Sonny Corinthos' ego. "Let me buy you dinner," Sonny offered. "We could talk about what happened with Dante…and with us.""There is no us anymore, Sonny, so it doesn't really matter," Kate informed him. "You can consider this closure. You go back to living your life, I go back to living mine. There's really nothing left to say."Sonny opened his mouth to protest, but another male voice shut him down before he could."You heard the lady," Coleman said in a somewhat territorial tone of voice. "She's got a life to live that don't involve you." Coleman walked over to Kate and grinned, leaning in for a kiss. "Hey, baby. Miss me?"Kate scrunched her nose up, teasing Coleman, before nodding a yes and returning his kiss. "Mhm, very much. I just have to finish up here with a conference call to Paris and then we can go."Coleman nodded, making his way back into the main lobby of Crimson to wait for his new lady love, but not before addressing the mob boss in the room one more time. "Like my new designer duds?" he asked Sonny confidently. "Kate got 'em for me." Smirking, Coleman purposefully brushed shoulders with Sonny on his way out, leaving him staring at Kate with an 'Are you kidding me?" expression. "What?" Kate asked innocently. "I told you at your hearing…he's into me."Sonny seemed unconvinced. "Yeah, well y'know, I didn't think the two of you would still be…" Kate held up her hand to stop him."I'm not interested in your relationship advice, thank you." Sonny shook his head in amusement, pointing in the direction that Coleman had gone. "I hate to break it to ya, Connie, but your bartender buddy isn't really the relationship type," Sonny stated with a laugh."Oh, so it's Connie again?" Kate asked. "Never mind. We're done here, Sonny. Please leave," Kate said without even looking up from her desk. Sonny lingered in her office a few seconds longer before finally taking the hint and seeing himself out. Coleman smiled cockily at him as he left and Sonny nodded in his direction, faking an unthreatened smile. On the inside, however, he was starting to feel something he hadn't let himself feel when it came to Kate for the last few months. Jealousy.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three:**Kate released an exhausted sigh as she finished her second cup of chai tea in the past hour and flipped through the signed modeling contract Kristina had finally managed to fax her from Alexis' office. Apparently, as deciphered from Kristina's frantic texts early this morning, Alexis was forcing her oldest daughter to spend a day in the life of a lawyer in hopes of swaying her back towards the love of all things legal. Not having an excuse aside from, "I love fashion" and "I gave Kate my word," Kristina had asked that Kate send her some sort of binding contract to sign. It was the only kind of communication that she thought Alexis would listen to. "Kate, are you alright?" Lulu and Maxie asked in unison as they noticed their boss fighting to keep her eyes open. She was usually more alert than the two of them put together, and not one insult had been thrown their way today to deflect. It was a bit concerning."I know contracts are boring and all, but you're always telling us we can't afford not to read the fine print," Maxie added in an upbeat tone of voice, trying her best to be encouraging without coming off as disrespectful. The truth was, Kate was like a cat. You could never be too sure of her moods so Maxie was always tip toeing around what she really wanted to say. Lulu, on the other hand, had no qualms about opening her big mouth."What Maxie and I are trying to say is…you look rough," Lulu stated. "I mean, you forgot to put on eyeliner. You're not, like, dying from cancer or something are you?""Lulu!" Maxie shrieked, nearly choking on the yogurt parfait she was eating for breakfast. Obviously, the word tact wasn't in the Spencer family dictionary. "I cannot believe you just asked her that." Maxie laughed nervously before glancing back at Kate, who had yet to say a word. Kate not talking back to them was like being in the Twilight Zone and Maxie didn't like it. She never thought that it would actually make her uncomfortable not to have Kate biting her heard off about something but it did. "You aren't sick, are you?" she asked cautiously. Finally looking up, Kate flashed her two assistants her famous fake smile that had been perfected over the years before shaking her head no. "Don't be silly. I'm in perfect health, though I appreciate your caring spirits…some spirits more sensitive than others," she observed with amusement as Lulu gave her an apologetic look. "I just didn't get a good night's sleep, compliments of a rather annoying Chihuahua that really should be put out of his misery. Honestly, why people choose to own pets will forever remain a mystery to me.""Are you sure that's all it is?" Maxie asked. She knew that she was probably pushing her luck, and she could be wrong, but it just seemed like Kate was dealing with a lot more than a lack of sleep. "I mean, I know we're not really friends but if you ever wanted to talk…""Maxie," Kate cut her off before she could finish her heart-to-heart offer. "When a person tells you that they're fine you would do well to respect that and leave well enough alone. Now, you and Lulu probably have a list of things that need to be done. Or if you're bored, I'm sure I can find plenty of work for you two to fill up your day with.""Right, we're on it," Maxie and Lulu responded, leaving Kate alone with her thoughts. Her assistants were too perceptive and nosy for their own good. A neighbor's dog had been barking, but the truth was that Kate's discussion with Sonny yesterday had been what kept her up tossing and turning. She hadn't been able to enjoy her dinner with Coleman or their kissing session after because Sonny's face kept haunting her; his troubled, tortured eyes and those dimples always seemed to get her mind reeling. She had thought, mistakenly, that the effect he had on her would've burned out with their failed romance. Resting her head in her hands, Kate sat in silence for the next five minutes replaying their conversation in her head. The editor and chief of Crimson was so absorbed in the memory that she didn't even notice Sonny as he let himself into her office holding a pack of chocolate covered raisins."You look like you could use a pick me up," Sonny declared with a smile. Kate's head jolted up in surprise as he laid the box of sweets on her desk. "What do you want, Sonny?" she greeted, pretending to be annoyed by his visit despite the both of them knowing deep down that would never be the case. "Whatever it is, trying to put me into a sugar coma certainly isn't going to help your case."Sonny shrugged and made a move to take back the raisins but Kate slid them off of her desk and into a drawer before he could. "Maxie or Lulu might want them," she explained. "If that's your story," Sonny replied with a smirk. "Listen, uh, I came here to ask you to drop this whole modeling thing with Kristina." "Hmm, experiencing some déjà vu here. Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't we already have this discussion? You and Alexis telling me I'm ruining your daughter's life…any of this ringing a bell with you?"Sonny nodded, walking behind her desk so that Kate wouldn't have anything to hide behind as they talked. "Yeah, yeah. But that was with the yelling and Alexis was here, and I thought I'd come back by and, y'know, ask ya again," Sonny explained with a poorly rehearsed look of innocence."You have a really hard time hearing the word no, don't you?" Kate fought the urge to roll her eyes at his attempt to butter her up and try to get her to bully Kristina out of her dream. "If I had listened to everyone in Bensenhurst and their disapproval of the fashion world, where would I be today? I'm not going to discourage Kristina from pursuing the things she finds important, not even for you Sonny.""Finally, someone who actually recognizes that I'm an adult with my own mind," Kristina Davis' voice greeted Kate with admiration and respect. "I have a feeling that you and I are going to get along just fine working together."Sonny looked back and forth between Kristina and Kate, clearly unhappy with how this situation was playing out. He had pictured a different result when the idea of coming to Kate again had entered his mind this morning. "Kristina, Yale will probably still take you back if you just let me make a few calls…" Sonny tried again, unwilling to let go of his stubbornness and need for control. "Dad, stop! I told mom and I'm going to tell you this one more time so listen closely. I am not going back to Yale no matter how hard the two of you push. Plus, I couldn't even if I wanted to because I already signed a contract, right Kate?" Kristina flashed her father a smile and nodded to Kate for back up."She's right, yes," Kate confirmed, feeling somewhat bad about what she had done as Sonny looked at her with disappointment. She honestly wasn't trying to undermine him with his kids and she didn't really regret her stance but Sonny's disapproval was disconcerting. "So rip the thing up," Sonny yelled. Kristina cross her arms and stood her ground. She channeled the Alexis part of her personality quite well when it came to standing up to her father. "Not going to happen, Dad," Kristina replied confidently. "I'm modeling Jacque's clothes for Crimson and you and mom both are going to have to get use to it whether you like it or not. Now, if you don't mind, Kate asked me to come in for a fitting and I'm sure she doesn't want your negativity around her magazine."Sonny stole one last sulking glance back at Kate before slamming the door to her office closed in anger, leaving without so much as a goodbye to her or Kristina. "He's worse than a child with his temper tantrums," Kristina complained. "Anyways, I'm all yours. Show me the clothes and I'll show you my pose," she joked, but paused when she noticed the worried expression on Kate's face."Hey, don't let my dad get to you. He's just a big bully. He'll be over it by next week," Kristina assured her. Kate laughed, trying to backtrack and cover up her embarrassment over how Sonny had reacted towards her support of Kristina's newfound modeling career but she wasn't doing a very good job of it. "You're right. It just surprised me how it seemed like my having you work for Crimson was some sort of betrayal to Sonny," she explained."That's just because dad has this thing where he thinks that any time he loves a woman, she should agree with everything he says involving his children and…"Kristina continued to ramble on, not realizing the full impact of what she had just said, but Kate had stopped hearing what the petite brunette in front of her was talking about the moment the word love exited her mouth. Sonny hadn't loved her, didn't love her. He'd made that painfully clear this past year with his mob ties, Carly, Claudia, and every other issue he had put before his and Kate's relationship. "Oh, no," Kristina finally picked up on what had just happened. "Don't tell me you didn't know." Kristina laughed, amused at how blind adults could be to what was right in front of them. "You still get under my dad's skin because he actually cares what you think, Kate. He might have married Claudia but anyone with eyes can see how crazy you make him. He never stopped loving you…and I'm starting to think that the feeling goes both ways…"


End file.
